Youth-Adult Dialogue

Youth fishbowl discussion is focus of Youth-Adult Dialogue. Stones in center bowl represent memory & intentions for the future

We recently held our 12th in a series of dialogues on Vashon Island, where I live. Nearly 80 of us showed up for a free chili and cornbread dinner and some “deep dish” on a tough subject: “DO NOT GO GENTLE: Facing the Challenges of the Future.”

The dialogues were initiated in 2004 by the Vashon Youth Council after the strangling death of 17-year-old Sharna Jones by her father, who later killed himself. “Enough,” said the teens at the Youth Council who had witnessed a similar dialogue on Whidbey Island facilitated by my friends from the Power of Hope. “We’ve got to improve communication between generations on this Island.”

And I think we’ve made a great start. Topics have ranged from drugs & alcohol, safe ways to mark endings and transitions, and gender stereotypes to finding right livelihood and this year’s theme of shifting the culture of fear. Both kids and adults have reported being able to talk about previously taboo topics as a result of these community conversations.

At this month’s dialogue, over dinner, intergenerational groups discussed two questions: What do you see as the biggest challenges of the future? What are your strategies for addressing them?

Then youth and adult facilitators had us stand on either side of a line that represented various divides or challenges in life – youth on one side, adults on the other. Then various challenges identified by the table discussions were read out – global warming, political divisiveness, racism, economic meltdowns, getting into the college of choice – and people were asked to “cross the line” if they saw this as a significant challenge.

Then we formed a large circle, where storyteller and mythologist Michael Meade drummed and invited us to sing before he told an Asian story, “The Tiger’s Whisker,” about a woman facing her biggest challenge, and the patient simple ways she dealt with it. Halfway through the story, Michael stopped and asked us to find someone from another generation with whom to discuss our own fears. Those pairs then got together with others to identify common themes.

Out of those conversations came some general questions and insights: Why do adults view young people with suspicion and vice versa? Are there commonalities between adults facing death and youth facing economic and personal relationship issues? What slow steps can each of us take to face our demons, personally and collectively? The second half of Meade’s story echoed a number of themes we discussed.

A centerpiece of these dialogues is always a “youth fishbowl,” where the youth talk among themselves in the middle of a circle and adults just listen. Then we open the dialogue up for anybody to talk, and ask people to reflect on how this communication might change the way we relate to each other in the future.

For a youth perspective on this dialogue, check out Sierra Saunders’ article in the Vashon High School newspaper, The Riptide. And look at this video made by the talented 23-year-old Freddy Rhoads.